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Feeling Out of Control? Lacking Boundaries?

January 27, 2010 by Wendy Bryan Leave a Comment

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A week or so ago, we were graced with the presence of our new dog Max.

Max is a gorgeous two year old Border Collie X Golden Retriever and he came to us via an animal re-homing service.  His previous owner couldn’t keep him due to her ill health. She cared for him well as Max is a good boy already, although a little boistrous (but he’s only two!) and his behaviour in the park and at the beach is not the best, but he’s smart and willing to learn. He is so keen to please  – as all dogs are and patiently await guidance from their human masters.

I’m a little out of practice in dealing with young ones, our Harry being 15 now, and I am fascinated at how Max responds to the way we interact with him and this of course started me thinking of how humans interact with each other and their children, in particular.

As with dogs, children await the guidance of their parents. They are looking for strong leadership and calm, clear directions.  If you tell a dog to SIT and then don’t follow through with how to actually achieve this, he/she won’t have a clue what you are talking about.  If you yell at him/her, he just becomes frightened.  If you don’t know how to train a dog, then go and learn from a suitably qualified and experienced person.  Same with children.  If you are not sure of your ability to guide, lead and discipline your children effectively so they live a happy and fulfilling life, be sure to enlist professional help.

Dogs can become wild of temperament and wilful in their ways if not trained and disciplined.  Funny…………, so can children.  Sorry folks, but it’s rarely the dog’s fault as he was always willing to learn and, so are children.  A dog may react angrily out of fear and guess what……….so do children. And then they grow up, dogs and children and both find it harder to change their undisciplined ways in order to live peacefully and happily. Although dogs are pretty much always willing and adaptable, which is questionable in some human adults.

If you don’t have adequate boundaries and disciplines in place and even more importantly, ensure that they are acted on consistently, there will come a time when you will have little or no control over your offspring and their behaviour will become, more often than not, unruly and unacceptable because they don’t respect you as a strong leader.

Same with dogs.

So, I’m off to increase my knowledge and effectively teach Max how to be a little calmer when meeting new dogs at the park so for him, and for us,

EVERY DAY GETS BETTER.

 

 

 

 

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About Wendy

Wendy has been a Stress Management counsellor, consultant and group leader in her own business for over thirty years. Wendy is passionate about animals and nature and helping others to bring more peace and calm to their lives.

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